Thoughts on the Spendley Reunion 2013
05/08/13 14:18
On the weekend of August 2nd thru August 4th - approximately 70 members of the Spendley-Hayden family descended on Ocean City, Maryland for a Family Reunion celebration. The weather was absolutely perfect and it seemed like everyone enjoyed seeing everyone as well as participating in the various weekend activities. For a more detailed recap of the weekend including pictures as well as the picture slideshows shown on Saturday evening, please navigate to the Reunion Tab and select Ocean City Reunion. We plan on adding more pictures as well as additional video footage of the Saturday evening festivities at a later date.
My initial thoughts on this wonderful weekend are just filled with great memories and plenty of laughs. It seemed like everyone was so thrilled to see each other and it was obvious that 9 years between reunions is much too long. It would be interesting to hear everyone’s thoughts (by adding comments below) on what is the correct period of time between reunions.
In my opinion, the 3-5 year timeframe makes the most sense. As families spread their wings it seems like it would be way too difficult to have a reunion every year or even every 2 years. My thoughts are we should to set a goal of every 3 years with the goal being absolutely to have one every 5 years. I think it should deb up to the next committee to actually decide the timeframe but I think as a family we can provide some feedback on what makes sense to all of us.
I also think that the dates should actually be set even sooner than we did for this past reunion (set in February - approximately 6 months). I think the sooner the date is picked the easier it is for people to plan their calendars. Potentially, we lost some participants this year because of some conflicts in the dates which might be avoided if we selected the date earlier.
The location is always going to be an issue, The Spendley-Hayden family is somewhat spread out and it will always cause some amount of travel for some or most of the family. I also think that the Reunion Committee should have the final say in picking a location - the location is an important part of the event so again this needs to be decided as early as possible (perhaps not as early as the date but certainly as early as possible). It would be interesting to hear from others as to the location and suggestions as to what could be considered for future reunions, again use the comments section below to share your thoughts. As a final note on location - the Committee should not underestimate the value of having some committee members relatively nearby to make sure logistics can easily be arranged. In this past venue - having Walt and Robyn, Marilyn and I nearby made it easier to plan the various details required to pull off a weekend event.
The final piece of the equation is the venue - I think this is an absolute critical part of the equation. It would be interesting to hear everyone’s thoughts on this past reunion from a venue and logistical perspective. Francis Scott Key is an older facility but they have recently updated their look and it appears that people were satisfied with the accommodations at FSK. The OC Firehall seemed like a perfect location for the Saturday dinner - it was perhaps a bit cramped but the facility itself was great, especially from an audio-visual perspective. In addition - having the golf and the fishing as close as they were also seemed to be a positive. The one thing I might suggest as a change is to have the outside activities (golf, fishing or whatever others) on Friday. That will enable the family to spend Saturday together doing more things together as an entire family. We could have made Saturday afternoon more family oriented with more family activities (just my opinion).
The weekend was filled with some great memories - after all, not many times you can see a Spendley - Hayden family member praying to the Porcelain God!!! Or, a trio of AUnt Rosemary, Uncle Bob and Uncle Bill singing “Down by the Old Mill Stream”!!! The younger generation seemed to bond well and we have a reunion committee picked for the next family reunion.
As a final note - there were many objectives achieved with this reunion, but the most rewarding was seeing, Uncle Bob, Aunt Kathy, Aunt Rosemary, Uncle Bill and Aunt Janet having a great time as they enjoyed seeing the Spendley-Hayden family gather and have fun together as a family. We are disappointed that Aunt Janet had a medical emergency on Friday and couldn’t make it but the Senior Generation truly enjoyed the gathering and for all us committee members, we were thrilled that all of them had a chance to be a part of a special gathering of Spendley’s and Hayden’s.
Thanks to everyone who participated - if you have any thoughts or comments that you want to share with the next reunion committee - please do so by commenting on this blog below.
My initial thoughts on this wonderful weekend are just filled with great memories and plenty of laughs. It seemed like everyone was so thrilled to see each other and it was obvious that 9 years between reunions is much too long. It would be interesting to hear everyone’s thoughts (by adding comments below) on what is the correct period of time between reunions.
In my opinion, the 3-5 year timeframe makes the most sense. As families spread their wings it seems like it would be way too difficult to have a reunion every year or even every 2 years. My thoughts are we should to set a goal of every 3 years with the goal being absolutely to have one every 5 years. I think it should deb up to the next committee to actually decide the timeframe but I think as a family we can provide some feedback on what makes sense to all of us.
I also think that the dates should actually be set even sooner than we did for this past reunion (set in February - approximately 6 months). I think the sooner the date is picked the easier it is for people to plan their calendars. Potentially, we lost some participants this year because of some conflicts in the dates which might be avoided if we selected the date earlier.
The location is always going to be an issue, The Spendley-Hayden family is somewhat spread out and it will always cause some amount of travel for some or most of the family. I also think that the Reunion Committee should have the final say in picking a location - the location is an important part of the event so again this needs to be decided as early as possible (perhaps not as early as the date but certainly as early as possible). It would be interesting to hear from others as to the location and suggestions as to what could be considered for future reunions, again use the comments section below to share your thoughts. As a final note on location - the Committee should not underestimate the value of having some committee members relatively nearby to make sure logistics can easily be arranged. In this past venue - having Walt and Robyn, Marilyn and I nearby made it easier to plan the various details required to pull off a weekend event.
The final piece of the equation is the venue - I think this is an absolute critical part of the equation. It would be interesting to hear everyone’s thoughts on this past reunion from a venue and logistical perspective. Francis Scott Key is an older facility but they have recently updated their look and it appears that people were satisfied with the accommodations at FSK. The OC Firehall seemed like a perfect location for the Saturday dinner - it was perhaps a bit cramped but the facility itself was great, especially from an audio-visual perspective. In addition - having the golf and the fishing as close as they were also seemed to be a positive. The one thing I might suggest as a change is to have the outside activities (golf, fishing or whatever others) on Friday. That will enable the family to spend Saturday together doing more things together as an entire family. We could have made Saturday afternoon more family oriented with more family activities (just my opinion).
The weekend was filled with some great memories - after all, not many times you can see a Spendley - Hayden family member praying to the Porcelain God!!! Or, a trio of AUnt Rosemary, Uncle Bob and Uncle Bill singing “Down by the Old Mill Stream”!!! The younger generation seemed to bond well and we have a reunion committee picked for the next family reunion.
As a final note - there were many objectives achieved with this reunion, but the most rewarding was seeing, Uncle Bob, Aunt Kathy, Aunt Rosemary, Uncle Bill and Aunt Janet having a great time as they enjoyed seeing the Spendley-Hayden family gather and have fun together as a family. We are disappointed that Aunt Janet had a medical emergency on Friday and couldn’t make it but the Senior Generation truly enjoyed the gathering and for all us committee members, we were thrilled that all of them had a chance to be a part of a special gathering of Spendley’s and Hayden’s.
Thanks to everyone who participated - if you have any thoughts or comments that you want to share with the next reunion committee - please do so by commenting on this blog below.
Comments
Here Comes the Reunion
27/07/13 16:14
So the Spendley 2013 Reunion is only a month away. I am looking forward to seeing everyone and I hope everyone enjoys the weekend in Ocean City.
One of the objectives we want to accomplish is in a very positive way - honor the “Senior Generation” - My Dad and Mom, Aunt Janet, Aunt Rosemary, Uncle Bill and Aunt Janet. We have come up with some ways that each of them can participate in the Saturday Evening dinner. More importantly, we want to host the first annual “Real or Rumor” Spendley game. The game will involve trivia questions about the Spendley Family as well as stories that have been told over and over again - we just need to determine if these stories are real or just rumor!!!
The Reunion Committee has come up with several questions/stories but we need other family members to send in more questions and or stories that they want verified as Real or Rumor. For instance:
1) DId my brother Rob really ask my Mom and Dad if Grandpa was born bald? Or….
2) Which wedding did almost the entire wedding party dance the congo line thru another wedding and who was the person that lead that line? Or...
3) What was the name of the restaurant that Grandpa held every family function at?
I have shared the easy questions but we will need everyone to share either their best Spendley question or best Spendley story so we can share as much family folk lore as possible. The Committee has worked hard in trying to make the weekend and especially the Saturday evening dinner something special. We want to share laughs, we want to share our favorite stories and most of all we want to enjoy the time we are spending together. After all there is no telling when the next family reunion will be so lets make sure this one is a classic and one to be remembered for a long time. Please share your favorite story or question with me by hitting the contact me at the bottom of the page and sending me an email with the specific. Thanks and look forward to seeing everyone on the weekend of Aug 2 - 3, 2013.
In the meantime - maybe we could make some predictions about what might happen on Saturday night:
Will it involve Aunt Rosemary singing “Old Mill”!!!
Will it involve Uncle Bill taking the mic and telling a few famous family stories!!!
Will it involve Uncle Bob telling a story and crying before he is finished!!!
Will it involve Aunt Janet laughing at Aunt Rosemary singing Old Mill Pond, laughing at Uncle Bill’s stories and laughing at Uncle Bob crying!!!
If it is any of these items, it really is good news, because we have the opportunity to share this family reunion with each of them and as years go by those opportunities are not a sure thing. Let’s hope everyone has a wonderful time and there are plenty of memories, plenty of laughter and most of all plenty of stories told - after all what would be a Spendley party without a few Spendley stories!!!
One of the objectives we want to accomplish is in a very positive way - honor the “Senior Generation” - My Dad and Mom, Aunt Janet, Aunt Rosemary, Uncle Bill and Aunt Janet. We have come up with some ways that each of them can participate in the Saturday Evening dinner. More importantly, we want to host the first annual “Real or Rumor” Spendley game. The game will involve trivia questions about the Spendley Family as well as stories that have been told over and over again - we just need to determine if these stories are real or just rumor!!!
The Reunion Committee has come up with several questions/stories but we need other family members to send in more questions and or stories that they want verified as Real or Rumor. For instance:
1) DId my brother Rob really ask my Mom and Dad if Grandpa was born bald? Or….
2) Which wedding did almost the entire wedding party dance the congo line thru another wedding and who was the person that lead that line? Or...
3) What was the name of the restaurant that Grandpa held every family function at?
I have shared the easy questions but we will need everyone to share either their best Spendley question or best Spendley story so we can share as much family folk lore as possible. The Committee has worked hard in trying to make the weekend and especially the Saturday evening dinner something special. We want to share laughs, we want to share our favorite stories and most of all we want to enjoy the time we are spending together. After all there is no telling when the next family reunion will be so lets make sure this one is a classic and one to be remembered for a long time. Please share your favorite story or question with me by hitting the contact me at the bottom of the page and sending me an email with the specific. Thanks and look forward to seeing everyone on the weekend of Aug 2 - 3, 2013.
In the meantime - maybe we could make some predictions about what might happen on Saturday night:
Will it involve Aunt Rosemary singing “Old Mill”!!!
Will it involve Uncle Bill taking the mic and telling a few famous family stories!!!
Will it involve Uncle Bob telling a story and crying before he is finished!!!
Will it involve Aunt Janet laughing at Aunt Rosemary singing Old Mill Pond, laughing at Uncle Bill’s stories and laughing at Uncle Bob crying!!!
If it is any of these items, it really is good news, because we have the opportunity to share this family reunion with each of them and as years go by those opportunities are not a sure thing. Let’s hope everyone has a wonderful time and there are plenty of memories, plenty of laughter and most of all plenty of stories told - after all what would be a Spendley party without a few Spendley stories!!!
The Meaning of it's Fine
15/07/13 10:17
So - The Reunion Committee had a final organization meeting the weekend of July 13th and 14th. First of all, so everyone in the family understands, WE ABSOLUTELY TALK ABOUT EVERYONE IN THE FAMILY. I am 100% certain that there is not a Spendley- Hayden family member that has escaped the “discussions” during these organization meetings. It is one of the reasons I will always volunteer to be on the Reunion Committee - because I want to make sure I hear what is being said about me!!!
On Saturday, we spent a good amount of time touring the facilities and activities. Although, I do need to tell everyone, that at every possible stop, my cousin Walter was focused on the nearest bar so we could also make sure the bar accommodations were satisfactory to the Spendley - Hayden Clan. Since they all served cold beer and some frozen drinks we determined they all met the test.
On Saturday evening, the Reunion Committee (or maybe it is a more fair statement to say that the women of the Reunion Committee), decided they deserved lobster for dinner. So off we went to a great place in the north part of Ocean City, the Lobster Shanty. If I recall correctly - the woman got 3 puns lobsters and the men got hamburgers!!! Only kidding - I think everyone got lobster and I had crab cakes - lobster reminds me of Boston and we all know what I think of sports teams in Boston.
As dinner was almost finished, I was having a discussion with Maureen about our calendar for the summer and how hectic it has been. I was telling her that I had told Marilyn to stop saying yes to everything so we could have a weekend of absolutely nothing to do (so far that hasn’t worked - we are booked solid for the rest of the summer). Anyway - Maureen chuckled and went on to say how she and Marilyn had connived their way to picking this weekend, knowing that this was one of the possible free weekends back in the beginning of the summer. It is at this moment that I made a critical mistake, a typical mistake made by men and truly one they don’t understand - I responded by saying “ It was Fine”.
The good news is Maureen is not very demonstrative when she hears something that she doesn’t want to hear - NOT!!!
She fist asked me if I knew what “it’s Fine”, really means. I quickly responded by saying - it means, it’s fine, that I didn’t have a problem with it and has been fun. Maureen proceeded to interrupt all conversations at the dinner table and quickly relayed that I didn’t understand the meaning of “it’s fine”. Basically what transpired is one of those unique aspects of life - the women totally understood what Maureen was talking about and the men were puzzled. We quickly were told that “it’s Fine” means “It’s not Fine”, it means that there is an unusually high level of dissatisfaction or even disgust behind the meaning of “It’s Fine”.
Well, stupid me, I decided to challenge that and said that must be a Spendley - Hayden thing and it didn’t mean that to all women. How quickly I found out I was wrong as Maureen, Marilyn and Robyn went around to the other tables nearby and to my dismay, all women (at least 100% of the ones nearby) agreed with the 3 Spendley women. At that point, I told everyone it was time to leave and surprising everyone listened.
What I don’t understand is how can women arbitrarily change the english language and expect men to understand all their needs - personally, I am still stuck on what a woman really means (okay - my wife) when she says, YES OR NO!!! Now I have to put in perspective that every time I sat It’s fine - she thinks something is wrong and every time she says it to me it means I am in trouble.
Why do woman make our lives so damn confusing - can we get a little help here and have some other Spendley’s stick up with me, or are you going to agree that woman are in charge, so much so they can unilaterally change the meaning of english language (I guess Webster’s dictionary was written by a man).
On Saturday, we spent a good amount of time touring the facilities and activities. Although, I do need to tell everyone, that at every possible stop, my cousin Walter was focused on the nearest bar so we could also make sure the bar accommodations were satisfactory to the Spendley - Hayden Clan. Since they all served cold beer and some frozen drinks we determined they all met the test.
On Saturday evening, the Reunion Committee (or maybe it is a more fair statement to say that the women of the Reunion Committee), decided they deserved lobster for dinner. So off we went to a great place in the north part of Ocean City, the Lobster Shanty. If I recall correctly - the woman got 3 puns lobsters and the men got hamburgers!!! Only kidding - I think everyone got lobster and I had crab cakes - lobster reminds me of Boston and we all know what I think of sports teams in Boston.
As dinner was almost finished, I was having a discussion with Maureen about our calendar for the summer and how hectic it has been. I was telling her that I had told Marilyn to stop saying yes to everything so we could have a weekend of absolutely nothing to do (so far that hasn’t worked - we are booked solid for the rest of the summer). Anyway - Maureen chuckled and went on to say how she and Marilyn had connived their way to picking this weekend, knowing that this was one of the possible free weekends back in the beginning of the summer. It is at this moment that I made a critical mistake, a typical mistake made by men and truly one they don’t understand - I responded by saying “ It was Fine”.
The good news is Maureen is not very demonstrative when she hears something that she doesn’t want to hear - NOT!!!
She fist asked me if I knew what “it’s Fine”, really means. I quickly responded by saying - it means, it’s fine, that I didn’t have a problem with it and has been fun. Maureen proceeded to interrupt all conversations at the dinner table and quickly relayed that I didn’t understand the meaning of “it’s fine”. Basically what transpired is one of those unique aspects of life - the women totally understood what Maureen was talking about and the men were puzzled. We quickly were told that “it’s Fine” means “It’s not Fine”, it means that there is an unusually high level of dissatisfaction or even disgust behind the meaning of “It’s Fine”.
Well, stupid me, I decided to challenge that and said that must be a Spendley - Hayden thing and it didn’t mean that to all women. How quickly I found out I was wrong as Maureen, Marilyn and Robyn went around to the other tables nearby and to my dismay, all women (at least 100% of the ones nearby) agreed with the 3 Spendley women. At that point, I told everyone it was time to leave and surprising everyone listened.
What I don’t understand is how can women arbitrarily change the english language and expect men to understand all their needs - personally, I am still stuck on what a woman really means (okay - my wife) when she says, YES OR NO!!! Now I have to put in perspective that every time I sat It’s fine - she thinks something is wrong and every time she says it to me it means I am in trouble.
Why do woman make our lives so damn confusing - can we get a little help here and have some other Spendley’s stick up with me, or are you going to agree that woman are in charge, so much so they can unilaterally change the meaning of english language (I guess Webster’s dictionary was written by a man).
Jim Valavano's ESPY speech
13/03/13 22:41
First and Foremost - before you read this blog, go the separate web page that I have set up and listen to Jim Valvano’s 1993 ESPY Speech. Then you can read my thoughts and add your own as well.
I can distinctly remember watching Jim Valvano’s deliver his ESPY speech in March of 1993. I was never a fan of North Carolina State but who could ever forget one of the greatest NCAA Championship games, April 4, 1983. NC State scored the winning basket at the buzzer and upset the University of Houston - an unbelievable moment in Sports History. Besides the winning shot (which is replayed over and over again) there is also the scene of Coach Jim Valvano running all around the court looking for someone to hug.
10 years later (in the same month of achieving the pinnacle of his career) Jim Valvano died from cancer. Approximately 6 weeks before he passed away, Jim Valvano was the recipient of the most courageous award at the 1993 ESPY Awards. Barely able to walk with hardly any strength left in his body - Jim Valvano delivered one of the most impactful speeches of my lifetime. I remembered sitting in a hotel room and watching this speech and crying - this speech and everything that Coach Valvano said was so close to my heart and soul.
One of the most memorable parts of this speech is when Jim describes a full day by saying if you can Laugh, Think and Cry in one day that this would be a full day and if you could do this every day of your life you would have experienced a wonderful life. I am not sure if everyone agrees with this - especially the crying part, sometimes we get hung up on words. What Jim Valvano was speaking to was being in touch with all the emotions of the human spirit and that we should never underestimate how laughter is so healthy, how thunking is so critical to our and how crying is so therapeutic.
I can distinctly remember watching Jim Valvano’s deliver his ESPY speech in March of 1993. I was never a fan of North Carolina State but who could ever forget one of the greatest NCAA Championship games, April 4, 1983. NC State scored the winning basket at the buzzer and upset the University of Houston - an unbelievable moment in Sports History. Besides the winning shot (which is replayed over and over again) there is also the scene of Coach Jim Valvano running all around the court looking for someone to hug.
10 years later (in the same month of achieving the pinnacle of his career) Jim Valvano died from cancer. Approximately 6 weeks before he passed away, Jim Valvano was the recipient of the most courageous award at the 1993 ESPY Awards. Barely able to walk with hardly any strength left in his body - Jim Valvano delivered one of the most impactful speeches of my lifetime. I remembered sitting in a hotel room and watching this speech and crying - this speech and everything that Coach Valvano said was so close to my heart and soul.
One of the most memorable parts of this speech is when Jim describes a full day by saying if you can Laugh, Think and Cry in one day that this would be a full day and if you could do this every day of your life you would have experienced a wonderful life. I am not sure if everyone agrees with this - especially the crying part, sometimes we get hung up on words. What Jim Valvano was speaking to was being in touch with all the emotions of the human spirit and that we should never underestimate how laughter is so healthy, how thunking is so critical to our and how crying is so therapeutic.
Super Bowl Depression
07/02/13 20:46
It is the day after Super Bowl XLVII - and yes I am not happy. The Ravens beat the 49ers in this years super bowl - how come I bet on the 49ers? I live in Baltimore - shouldn’t I have been rooting for Baltimore??? The Ravens had destroyed the Giants in a December regular season game - I had to listen to all these Raven fans put my team down, I wanted them to pay for being so cocky. Well - that did not work out to well. Football season is over and I am officially depressed.
I started to think about how the Spendley Family is primarily Giant Fans - except for my kids. Sean was a Patriots fan, Jason is a Dallas fan and Bryan is a Broncos fan. Somehow my kids chose to root for any team other than their Dad’s team - I blame Marilyn for that!!!
But than I realized that within our own family we have a lot of dissenters!!! For instance:
1) My cousin Kevin roots for the Red Sox, Patriots (and most likely the Celtics and the Bruins). How come Kevin is such a traitor - he grew up in New Jersey, he must have been exposed to the “family pressure”. I blame Sue for that defection. Yes its unfair to Sue because I would guess that Kevin was a Boston fan before he met Sue - but in my view Sue could have turned him back to his New York roots but no she is a New Englander and let Kevin be the #1 Spendley Sports Traitor.
2) How about the Hayden’s - they are Giant fans but from what I remember, they were all Met fans. How did that happen? Everyone I know from the New York Area kept to the party lines, Giant fans were Yankee fans, Jet Fans were Met Fans. That is just the way it is supposed to be - How come the Hayden’s crossed over the line and hated the Yankees and loved the Mets. Someone needs to explain that to me.
3) Grandpa - I don’t think Grandpa rooted for the same team twice and he certainly did not root for the same teams as my Dad. Come to think of it, Grandpa was the original dissenter, perhaps all of this is his fault!!!
In any event - at least most of the Spendley’s like the New York Giants and at least they have won 2 super bowls. It could be worse - we could all be knick fans and they have not won a championship since they had that infamous Spendley Ball Boy. Yes - the last championship the Knicks have won is in 1973, with Willis, Walt, Dollar Bill, Earl the Pearl and a ball boy named Mike.
I started to think about how the Spendley Family is primarily Giant Fans - except for my kids. Sean was a Patriots fan, Jason is a Dallas fan and Bryan is a Broncos fan. Somehow my kids chose to root for any team other than their Dad’s team - I blame Marilyn for that!!!
But than I realized that within our own family we have a lot of dissenters!!! For instance:
1) My cousin Kevin roots for the Red Sox, Patriots (and most likely the Celtics and the Bruins). How come Kevin is such a traitor - he grew up in New Jersey, he must have been exposed to the “family pressure”. I blame Sue for that defection. Yes its unfair to Sue because I would guess that Kevin was a Boston fan before he met Sue - but in my view Sue could have turned him back to his New York roots but no she is a New Englander and let Kevin be the #1 Spendley Sports Traitor.
2) How about the Hayden’s - they are Giant fans but from what I remember, they were all Met fans. How did that happen? Everyone I know from the New York Area kept to the party lines, Giant fans were Yankee fans, Jet Fans were Met Fans. That is just the way it is supposed to be - How come the Hayden’s crossed over the line and hated the Yankees and loved the Mets. Someone needs to explain that to me.
3) Grandpa - I don’t think Grandpa rooted for the same team twice and he certainly did not root for the same teams as my Dad. Come to think of it, Grandpa was the original dissenter, perhaps all of this is his fault!!!
In any event - at least most of the Spendley’s like the New York Giants and at least they have won 2 super bowls. It could be worse - we could all be knick fans and they have not won a championship since they had that infamous Spendley Ball Boy. Yes - the last championship the Knicks have won is in 1973, with Willis, Walt, Dollar Bill, Earl the Pearl and a ball boy named Mike.